Why Do We Do the Things We Regret?
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you've said or done something you immediately regretted? Perhaps you snapped at your spouse when they asked for help with a simple task, or you've felt stuck in a cycle of negativity, unable to see a way forward. These moments often leave us wondering, "Where did that come from?"
The truth is, these instances reveal more about our inner selves than we might like to admit. While we may try to excuse our behavior by saying, "That wasn't really me," or "I don't know what came over me," the Bible offers a profound insight into human nature that challenges this notion.
Jeremiah 17:9 tells us, "The heart is deceitful above all else." This verse suggests that those moments we try to disown are actually glimpses of our true selves – the parts we've learned to hide until our strength to conceal them runs out. Recognizing this reality is crucial because what we believe – whether truth or lie – determines how we live.
At the core of this struggle are idols of the heart. An idol is anything that becomes more important to us than God. These can be subtle or obvious, but they all cause us to fall short of who we are meant to be in Christ. Ezekiel 14:3 speaks of those who "have taken their idols into their hearts," while 1 John 5:21 exhorts us to "keep yourselves from idols."
Identifying these heart idols can be challenging, but there's a powerful principle we can apply: When you're intimately familiar with the truth, you can easily spot the lies. This idea is beautifully illustrated in the story of a child mixing real and play money. Just as a discerning eye can quickly distinguish genuine currency from counterfeit, so too can a mind focused on God's truth recognize the falsehoods that lead us astray.
This brings us to our central theme: Focus on the truth of Jesus, and lies lose their power.
The apostle Paul addresses this concept in his letter to the Colossians. In chapter 3, verses 1-4, he emphasizes that the battle for truth begins in our minds. We're called to set our minds on things above, not on earthly things. This isn't just positive thinking; it's a fundamental shift in perspective that acknowledges our new identity in Christ.
For those who have been "raised with Christ," our very life is hidden with Christ in God. This means that every moment of our existence should be lived in response to who we are in Christ and the future glory that awaits us. As C.S. Lewis wisely noted, "Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you will get neither."
But how do we practically apply this truth-focused mindset? Paul provides guidance in Colossians 3:5-11, where he lists behaviors and attitudes that we must "put to death" or "put away." These include sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, greed, anger, rage, malice, slander, and lying.
Interestingly, Paul equates some of these behaviors with idolatry. This reinforces the idea that behind every sin against God and others is a belief in a lie about God, the world, ourselves, or others. When we find ourselves acting in ways we regret, we need to honestly ask, "What lie, contrary to the truth of Jesus, am I believing that led me to do this?"
Consider the biblical example of King David. His affair with Bathsheba and the subsequent murder of her husband, Uriah, stemmed from believing lies about what would bring him the greatest pleasure and the need to hide his sin at all costs. It was only when David exposed these lies to the truth of God's love and forgiveness that he found restoration.
In our daily lives, we might encounter lies that fuel anger, resentment, or insecurity in our workplaces or relationships. The antidote is to focus on the truth of Jesus. When we feel underappreciated or mistreated, we can remember that Jesus sees our work and that His opinion is eternally significant. When faced with injustice or disappointment, we can choose joy by focusing on the eternal weight of glory that far outweighs our present struggles (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).
To help us maintain this focus, there are four key truths about God that can displace the lies we encounter:
God is great, so we can be joyful. His greatness means He controls the outcomes of our lives, freeing us from the burden of trying to control everything ourselves.
God is good, so we can be secure. His goodness ensures we have all we need to live the life He has called us to live.
God is glorious, so we can be overcomers. By making Jesus our priority, we can overcome the idols and lies that lead to destructive pathways.
God is gracious, so we are redeemed. There is nothing comparable to the salvation and redemption offered by Jesus. We are eternally loved more deeply than we ever dreamed possible.
As we internalize these truths and focus on Jesus, the lies that have held us captive begin to lose their power. This transformation isn't always instantaneous, but it is profound and lasting.
Remember the story of the angry young man who reluctantly attended church? His life was radically changed when he encountered the genuine love of Jesus through a community of believers. This love revealed his hidden heart, leading to a dramatic shift from anger to joy.
Whether you're struggling with anger, lust, bitterness, or any other challenge, the power to overcome lies in focusing on the truth of Jesus. You have everything you need in Him to conquer the idols and lies holding you back.
So today, ask yourself: Which of the four key truths about God do I need most in my life right now? How can I intentionally focus on the truth of Jesus to displace the lies I've been believing?
As you embark on this journey of renewing your mind and spiraling your life upward with the truth of Jesus, remember: Focus on the truth of Jesus, and lies lose their power. In Him, you have the strength to overcome and the promise of a joy-filled, purpose-driven life.